Vampire Heart Read online

  Caleb laced his fingers with mine and gave me a peck on the lips.

  “Me neither, baby, but you know what they say. Misery loves company.”

  “I…I need to be alone right now,” I said, and it hurt me as much as it hurt Caleb.

  “Don’t shut me out, please. And there’s no need to keep yourself accountable for everything that happens.”

  “I know,” I nodded. “I’m not. I’m just not in the mood.”

  Caleb pursed his lips and let it go. He gave me another kiss, opened the cab door, and got out.

  “Keep safe, okay?” he said and waited for my response.

  I looked at him for a few moments and tried to smile, but it probably didn’t do anything to appease his worry.

  “I’ve got Mrs. Weatherby. Remember?”

  “Call me when you get home,” he said and closed the door.

  My gaze was set on him as he walked down the street and stopped at number thirteen, fiddled with his keys, and disappeared into his apartment.

  It was painful being away from him. That much I knew. We both did. And I couldn’t wait for the day we could move in together and be in each other’s presence. Him. Me. Nora. Even Annabel. We could be a family, together.

  The mere thought of having a family with him after the three months we’d been together should have scared me, would have scared the old me, but it didn’t. But mated or not, how far would he go for me until he got fed up with my uselessness, regret mating with me instead of a familiar, and try and get rid of the ancient magic that bonded us. If it could be ridded.

  “Where are we going, mate?” the driver said, looking at me through his rear-view mirror.

  I gave him my address and he drove off while I stared out into everything, but nothing in particular, watching the blur of the passers-by while humans went about their business.

  That used to be me. I used to be one of those people that lived in ignorance. Yes, I’d known about witches, but I hadn’t known about Nightcrawlers, mind control, or demons. None of the shit we’d gone through had ever crossed my mind.

  Now, my life was crisis after crisis. After crisis. And if I couldn’t rise through the current one, Caleb might not even have to try to get rid of me. He might have to suffer my death.

  The driver pulled over at the side of my street and I tapped my card on the card reader before stepping out of the car.

  My hilt was already in my hand, and my finger rested on the button that pulled the blade out. Then I remembered vampires couldn’t walk out in the sun, and the tension in my whole body released.

  I was ready for my bed. To let go of everything and just die, if only for a little bit.

  It proved futile. Trying to sleep, that is. Whenever I closed my eyes, flashes of last night’s events took over me, and I relived everything.

  The witch hanging on for dear life. Her girlfriend unable to save her. The blonde vampire who had destroyed two lives in an instant.

  And with everything, I tried to think what I could have done differently. How I could have saved her.

  Wasn’t it ironic that, when I hadn’t known I was a witch, I had saved my life without realizing it because of the stupid spells I had once snorted? And now I couldn’t even get a tiny crystal to obey me.

  I watched the ceiling go whiter as the sun moved up in the sky. The hands of the clock on the wall turned around painfully slow, over and over again. I bit my fingernails until my fingers were red. It wasn’t happening.

  My mind was racing. There was no getting any rest for me today. All I could do was look at everything around me, question my sanity, my power, my existence.

  Until I reached a verdict. Everything had been much simpler when I’d been just a witch hunter.

  I hadn’t had Caleb then and I had been a puppet for someone, but I hadn’t known at the time. Life was too complicated as a witch. And as much as I wanted to celebrate my new status, I couldn’t. It was impossible. How could I be failing at being my true self? Because being a witch was an integral part of me both Christian and Mom had intended to erase.

  The rosary made of spells on my bedside table mocked me. Its energy radiating through me, through the whole apartment, and as much as I could feel it, I could do nothing about it.

  Caleb had given it to me a few days after Tower Bridge. He’d had it tailor-made for me. Such a lavish gift for someone with no abilities.

  I snatched it from the side of my bed and played with the crystals in my fingers.

  Why won’t you let me tame you? Is it punishment for my past? Are you trying to protect me from something?

  Why am I even talking to a gemstone?

  I’d never craved their magic. Not since Caleb had released me of the addiction Christian had enforced on me. But now I did. I craved to use it. To be able to do more than just deflect others’ magic. I wanted to protect Caleb and my friends, my family, from harm.

  If I…?

  Would it help if I used again? Of my own accord? They’d made me a danger before. Unable to withhold my witch powers inside. Would it help me get a hold on my spell casting?

  My feet were on the floor before I could think it through, and my hands found the back of the wardrobe and I pulled the panel open.

  The room was so empty. I hadn’t been there in so long, it looked almost alien. A little ancient even. With a clear head, it looked like a sacrificial altar.

  I found the chair and sat my ass down before I changed my mind. The spell pulsed between my fingers when I set it down into the mortar.

  This doesn’t mean anything. I’m not addicted. I’m just trying something out. I kept repeating it in my head to make it true.

  And it was true. I wasn’t craving the high like I had before. My head wasn’t hazy from the need. It wasn’t that I couldn’t function without it. I just needed to figure out if magic was easier with the high.

  I pounded it to a fine powder and lined it up. I leaned over it, shutting one nostril with my finger. I braced myself.

  My heart ached immediately. Everything blurred and fuzzed, and I knew I’d made a big mistake.

  So what if I could cast spells on a high? Did that mean I’d have to go into battle high? Would I have to become a junkie—a real one this time—to be a witch?

  Before the rush washed off me and I regretted my actions even more, I grabbed for another spell on the rosary and held it in my palm.

  “Light,” I said with a clear voice.

  The spell stayed intact in my hand. Cold as a marble. Tiny in my large hand.

  Yeah, that’s what I thought.

  It was a stupid experiment anyway. I went back to the bedroom and this time my eyes shut when I hit the mattress. I should have known nothing would happen.

  I was doomed. And so was everyone around me.

  Six

  Caleb

  Looking back at the big mansion that was Ash’s house, I wondered how much things had actually changed. And I hated myself for it.

  Ash was a good man. Sure, he was a bit of a show-off, and he did like the look of his money on himself, but he wasn’t like the old members of the high council.

  Yet, he had called for an emergency meeting at his place, and I stood outside, watching all the witches that belonged in the new board file inside in silence.

  Something bad had happened. Something bigger than the witch’s death last night. The eerie quiet gave me the chills, whatever it was about. Now would certainly not be the right time to discuss taking up Ash’s offer to join the inner circle.

  I put one foot in front of the other and walked myself inside, past the big arch on the right of the hallway and into the dining room which, while spacious, was crammed with witches of all ages. Some I recognized as patrons of the cafe and others from my interactions with the council previously. The majority of them I hadn’t seen before. Especially the ones taking up the chairs at the table.

  I knew Ash and Graham of course. And the third person had fought beside us at Tower Bridge—Lucy I think was her
name.

  But there were six other people sitting down, and I hadn’t a clue who they were.

  Graham waved and gestured at me to approach. I brushed past the gazillion witches and got to his side. Seeing as there was nowhere for me to sit, I crouched down so we could talk.

  “Why are we having an emergency meeting, Gray?” I asked.

  Graham was about to answer when he paused and smiled, the wrinkles on his face deepening by doing so.

  “You haven’t called me that in…in forever,” he said and cupped my cheek like he used to when we’d first met.

  I rolled my eyes at his patronizing PDA, but I didn’t do anything to remove his hand from me. I’d missed this. Missed his presence in my life. And I didn’t mean the angry, reprimanding Graham that always seemed to blame me when things went wrong. I meant the fatherly Graham that had been there for me throughout my witch life.

  Had he made mistakes? A sea of them. Was he trying to make amends now? For sure. Could I forgive him for everything? Only time would tell.

  “What’s going on?” I repeated, casting my glance around the table. Some witches were downright staring at me.

  I couldn’t blame them. Since the demon war, I’d become quite the sensation. Some witches couldn’t believe I had invoked Avalis, even if it had been to save humanity, and others were astounded with my ability to do so. Thankfully, no one knew what it had taken to call on her, because if they knew two witches had mated, an unnatural process to say the least, there would be quite the upheaval. And I couldn’t quite deal with witches panicking about what my mating meant for the order of things.

  “Last night,” Graham started. “There was a—”

  Someone clapped and silence fell around the room. It was Ash. He was a man of status and class, but I’d never quite seen him as a leader. Not until now. He appeared…natural. As if he’d been doing it all his life.

  Whatever happened with the Nightcrawlers, I hoped to all the gods and goddesses he stayed in charge. His ethics could at least make the coven half decent again.

  “Thank you all for coming on such short notice. I’m afraid we have a terrible situation in our midst. Christian Marlowe’s body is missing. Myself, Lucy, and Graham wanted to keep this under wraps to avoid a panic, but after last night’s events, there’s no point avoiding the inevitable. We weren’t sure he was alive, but it’s becoming more apparent with every passing day.”

  “Last night? What happened last night?” I asked, and I could feel the hot stares of the room on me.

  Ash bit his lower lip and took a deep breath.

  “Twenty-two witches were murdered by vampires. We don’t know which clan led the attack. We haven’t been able to catch any of the culprits, and all the clans have turned down our calls and summons, but it doesn’t look like a coincidence.”

  I tried to process what he’d said. We’d called him last night to tell him what had happened, but he hadn’t mentioned the other attacks.

  “Does this have anything to do with Nolan’s pack turning their backs on us?” I asked him.

  I heard a resounding “no” that made everything shake in the room. All heads turned towards the entrance and cleared the way for Kathleen. Mother Red Cap.

  One of the male witches at the table gave his seat to her and bowed to her, but she ignored the over-the-top expression of respect.

  Kathleen was one of the oldest witches alive. She’d been hiding for centuries from the high council and other witches. And now, because of me and everything that had happened on that bridge, her secret was out in the open.

  “Nolan is not collaborating with the vampires. That much he wants to be clear. He and the rest of the Nightcrawlers have nothing to do with the attacks last night,” she said.

  Ash paused for a second and turned to me.

  “What are we talking about now?” he asked.

  Was this a new development he wasn’t aware of?

  Kathleen and I exchanged glances, and I gave her a nod to continue.

  “The majority of the Nightcrawler community feel that…” she started, and I tuned her out while she rehashed everything Nolan had said to me yesterday.

  Nightcrawlers against witches. Vampires killing witches. Christian out and at large. The whole community in turmoil. What was next?

  When would all this bullshit come to an end? We needed a breather. I needed a breather. If I wasn’t out hunting hunters and falling for my enemy who wasn’t really my enemy, I was having to invoke ancient divine creatures to stop other divine creatures from destroying the mortal world. Couldn’t we go back to normal, whatever that was?

  The thought took me by surprise. I’d always enjoyed the dark side. As a vampire, as a witch. It was intoxicating and addictive. Had it got me into a lot of trouble? Hell yes. But it was hard to stop. Especially when I could be helping more and more people.

  It had only been once in my life before that I’d wanted to settle down and be normal, and that hadn’t lasted very long.

  Jin had been the love of my life. I had been young, but as an immortal, I’d wanted to be by the side of someone who understood and could tame my needs. And Jin had been that and so much more. With him, I’d felt normal. I had been normal. It hadn’t mattered that I’d had to feed on O-negative every single night and that walks in the park could only be achieved in moonlight. He had been my sweetheart, and I’d been his.

  That’s why when I lost him, I hadn’t thought I’d ever find it again. Life was going to go back to the crazy shit it had always been. And I was never going to get a happy-ever-after. Those were dreams and fairy tales.

  Only a guy had come into my life, twice, and given me those butterflies everyone always talked about and which I hadn’t felt since Jin.

  Sure, our history was rocky and complicated, but we were finally becoming something. Hell, we were lifemates now, whether we liked it or not.

  Was it terrible of me to want to give everything up and be with him, raising my phoenix non-daughter with my best friend?

  “This is not good, Kathleen. That’s not good at all,” Graham said, and I shook my head, focusing my attention back into the room.

  The faces of everyone had gone an even paler shade, the panic in their eyes prominent and wild.

  If only there was a fairy godmother to wave her wand and give everyone their happy-ever-after. But I wasn’t Cinderella, and even if I was, this was war, and even a fairy godmother couldn’t put an end to war.

  “I’m aware,” Kathleen replied. “But it is what it is, and you can’t change their minds. Not with words anyway. I’ll get out of your hair now. Blessed be.”

  Her greeting was old-fashioned and only the older witches in the room muttered it under their breaths, but it gave me chills thinking of how much older she was than anyone else present. She had been alive during both world wars. Had lived through the Witch Wars of 1854 and the Darkcrawler Uprising in 1801.

  She placed her hands on the table and pushed herself off the chair.

  “You’re their confidante,” I said while everyone watched her leave the room slowly. She paused and turned to look at me.

  “I am,” she said simply.

  “Can’t you convince them that turning their back to the high council doesn’t benefit anyone? Can’t you tell them how much different the high council is than before?” I said.

  Mother Red Cap looked around the room, surely not only watching everyone’s faces but also reading everyone’s thoughts.

  “Has it? I know you all mean well, but I still see—and feel—the same apathy towards the Nightcrawler community as the previous council.”

  With that, she turned her back and left the house.

  “She’s an old, senile witch. She doesn’t know what she’s talking about.” An older man broke the silence.

  I opened my mouth, ready to defend Kathleen’s health and status, but Graham spoke before I could get the words out.

  “Kathleen Bisset-Dupont is the oldest witch in the British Isles. She has m
ore power in her little finger than you’ve ever tamed in your entire life. If there’s anyone qualified in this room to talk about anything important, it’s her, and she’s just left the building.”

  My chest felt warm, and I couldn’t help it when my lips curved into a slight smile. This was the Graham I knew. Not the one I’d come face to face with so many times in the past few months about his terrible decisions.

  “I beg your pardon, Graham?” the witch said. “Who was it that caused this mess in the first place? You and your old council and the abhorrent agreement you made with that devil Christian. Frankly, dear, I don’t even know why we’ve allowed you into the new order.” My smile vanished.

  He was right. Graham might not be a monster, but he certainly contributed to making one. As much as he wanted to do good, he shouldn’t be in charge. Again.

  “Gentlemen”—Ash cleared his throat—“we have a crisis on our hands, and we need to figure out how best to deal with it.”

  I was glad Ash didn’t indulge either side and remained neutral. This wasn’t a time to turn on each other. This was a time to unite and bring about change. We could worry about the feuds later.

  “Caleb, how would you feel about taking a job for the council?”

  “What…what job?” I asked.

  Ash took a deep breath before he continued.

  “Do you think you and Wade can find out what’s happening with the vampires? If Christian really is behind them. We need to know ASAP. You will have full access to the spell arsenal of the coven whenever you need it, of course—”

  “I’ll do it,” I said before he could finish. There was nothing like making myself useful.

  “Great,” he replied. “The coven will be forever in your debt.”

  The crowd didn’t like that. My highly dramatic life might not have made the news, but it had certainly done the rounds of all the major witches in the coven, and Ash promising a lifelong debt wasn’t something they’d approve of.

  “Which brings me to my next subject…” Ash continued, not letting anyone argue.